Sick Heil!

It is tempting to start this post with the words "Hello sick people", but i have not yet obtained all the artifacts.
As a result, this post will mostly contain bitching about the recent necessity for an Ark, mostly because of workload. I shall now attempt to relate the sheer mass of the amount-ain of assignments.

The following have graced my desk over last week:

1. Mechanics 2 project, with our lovable little cytoplasm as a group member (i refuse to say group MATE)

2. Chinese test revision. Nothing more to say here, since I met my lawyer yesterday.

3. Lit Journal entry, which has caused nothing but calamity. It was postponed a total of four days, and for no good reason in particular, except maybe House seems like a real fortunate guy now.

4. Math additional exercises. The principle in these is the famed Zerg Rush, where spamming multiple questions in almost Megatron amounts eventually wears your defences down, thereby exposing you to all sorts of mental and emotional rape.5. Silly little Chem assignment due here and there, as well as the lab notebook.

And that's about it. Let's move on to what's ABOUT to grace my desk:

1. A really cu- i mean, Chinese compo, with the topic being the virtues of friendship. Joy.2. That VR survey that gives other surveys of the same king funny looks (gay), with a presentation on the results due by the last week of Septe-... shit.
And let's not forget that I've been out of action for two days now. i've missed a chem prac, couldn't do that bullshit compo, and missed our wonderful 1000th day celebration. I hear it took a while to come off, Shudder.

Banner than ever!

It's finally done! Steph's emo blog picture is now transformed and ready to be uploaded. Thousands shall ignore the picture, and the day shall come where it would be as if it never existed. But still!



Revel in it's insignificant glory.

Deprived by Logic

It's official. The last week has been dubbed the infamous "Disappointment week". Lam Day was a total letdown. Which reminds me...

Where the hell were you guys? Only people who showed up:

Timo
Steph
Cedric
Joyce (didn't watch the movie)
Damien (Wait... what?)
Beryl (I don't get this anymore...)
Kay Wee (O-Kay...)
Kay Wee's Henchmen

And thanks to those who could have shown up but didn't, you're helping us bury these puppies! The movie wasn't any better either, which shows that the most intelligent of all the people in the above list is Joyce. As for the rest, you bloody geniuses.

It was putrid. Check it out on Rotten Tomatoes and you'll get an overall rating of 20%. You'll also find that the story has a happy ending, which is totally unrealistic, as portrayed by this incident.

The holidays before that were also hideously disappointing. As ugly as a fat suit with no John Travolta in it.

Which reminds me...

Hairspray!!!

Exsteptions!

Sometimes, ACSI doesn't seem that gay. It's just a testament to how screwed up this place has become. Apparently, it's a manafacturing plant for logical fallacies.

Brother's laptop was confiscated yesterday, on the grounds of him playing Stepmania. I shan't say who, because I value my pistachois, but let it be known that it was 5, and no teacher has really stopped anyone from playing Stepmania.

While the above isn't really a valid point, neither is the following.

Mr Png took the opportunity to add in after a very amusing Fruit Salad song by Mr Sun, that it's important to have a healthy diet as well as a healthy mind. (Just like those Star Wars slide transitions)

He also took the opportunity to tell us to stay away from violent video games. (Give him nothing... but take from him... everything!!!) Now let it just be known here that I hve nothing against this stand. He wasn't forcing this on us, so we don't need to see his identification here...

But just before that, he had mentioned the confiscation of three laptops, confiscation for playing games in school.

I told Brother I that there were too many students in the way.

Mr Png had somehow managed to say that such games are violent, and detrimental to the mind and well being of a student. And while this issue is still debatable, what is more apalling is the application of this argument as a Red Herring. (Power to Ms Lam!)

Games being violent have nothing to do with playing them in school.

But fortunately, all three students have received their laptops back, and have vowed to quit their murderous hobby of Stepmania.

The day has come where arrows may breathe easy.

Boredoom!!!

Hey there. As we all know, it's the "holidays". Even as we speak it's coming to an end.

It's about time.

It's strange, but I think over all these years, I've become addicted to work. Holidays make me feel like a potential dengue threat. It's as if not working kil-

...................

Sorry about that. Anyway, as I was saying. Oh yeah. Not working kills me. And by work I don't mean staying at home revising for that upcoming ting xie (cough cough). I mean going to the campus and wrecking havoc at the drinks stall.

That's what life's about. This is nothing like a holiday.

Anyone who wants to send the government a message on Saturday, call me up or post on the tagboard will ya. Or just msn.

doodlelikecrazy@hotmail.com

I give you, The Mometer!

It's getting to be a pain in the ass, this one. I have no idea how it works so far, and neither does anyone. Johannes seems to be the only one who has a clue. *insert blue puppy here*

It's been a pretty generic holiday. Sitting at home doing nothing, then rushing out to school for projects. Of course, there are some perks to this kind of life (hint hint qio bu hint hint).

There's nothing much going on now, so I'll try and get some potential earth moving news to entertain you guys.

Sigh-lence is golden?


I don't think so. Kylie, Cancy and Rashidah weren't so sure though. After Kylie went to watch an extremely... peculiar movie called Little Miss Sunshine, she proceeded to debate on the effects of taking a vow of silence. And so they did. Cancy still holds a place in my... ah nevermind.


Their hair should grow back soon enough.

The following interview has been edited for.... readability. And with commentary.

Me:hey there. you okay if I interview you now? (Here I demonstrate giving her the illusion of choice.)

Kylie: hey. yeah it's okay

Me: ah... yeah. anywho

K:( interviewing me for what btw? just for fun yeah?)

M:indeed

K:okay

M:a man needs to update his blog reguarly (*cough* appreciation *cough*)

K:hahaha. i've read your blog

M:alrighty. first question. my blog's awesome, right?

K:the blogging is good yeah (There is hope for my debut yet.)

M:okay... now for the first real question. why did you decide to carry out this experiment? oh and by the way, this convo will be recorded

K:because i saw it in a movie. haha. joking.

M:silent hill?

K:the idea was from a movie, but the reasons are different.

M:what movie was it?

K:why, would be to discipline myself as well as to learn more about the effect of spoken words. Movie: Little Miss Sunshine. (Might I comment that it's a rather... unique movie. It's also pretty funky. The character that she got the idea from was somewhat of a side character, though all of the characters in the movie are more or less equally emphasized on.)

M:do you think then, that discipline is the act of restraining one's voice? that seems rather oppressive, don't you think?

K:it's not the act of restraining one's voice. but in doing so you can train discipline

M:ah. okay. another one here. why did cancy and rashidah do the same? they watched the movie too? (I've got to learn how to make them do that!)

K:nah they didn't. i kinda watched the movie and thought about doing it one day. then i told them (Oh.)

M:and then they just did it with you for the hell of it? (I've got to... nevermind)

K:they havent watched it. but they know about it and yeah
you think they found it weird? here's the movie trailer http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iNWRblcfoFw

M:aye. so how do you think your environment responded to your experiment? you think they found it weird?

K:yeah they found it weird. because well firstly my parents didn't allow me to do it at home. because they thought it was antisocial behaviour. and that it would ruin my reputation in sch.(They obviously haven't been here yet.) and that they just didn't like me daoing them.

M:did you explain that it was an experiment?

K:and they didn't think that doing things for the "experience" or to "experiment" was a good enough reason. (This could be a problem...)

M:okay... here's a pretty personal question.
have your parents ever considered you to be "lacking discipline"? (Whoa whoa we wah!)

K:hahaha no they have not. i don't know.

M:there was one time I saw rashidah using a notebook to communicate
and cancy too. you think this defeats the purpose?
what was the aim of your experiment? in one sentence.

K:to find out how one's self and the people around me respond to silence. (In other words, just sound, not communication itself, as she elaborates later.)

M:do you think that silence is just verbal silence, or simply not communicating at all?

K:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hYDQEmHqth4&NR=1
oh verbal silence. that link is a collection of scenes of that guy who took the vow

M:for how many days?

K:6 months or more i think. it's a movie (let me just say here that this guy is completely unrelated to me in any way whatsoever.)

M:so do you think your experiment was a success? (I fail to understand this concept.)

K:hurm. success as in i did learn a lot of stuff from it
not success as in i broke my vow a lot of times (Celiba- nevermind...)

M:oops . chinese oral, eh?

K:french (Ooh, kin- nevermind)

M:oh. that sucks

K:lol

M:ah. it's all greek to me. anyway, what do you think you learnt from this experience?

K:i leanrt that being silent makes people more emo (This here is very interesting. Emos tend to think that red fur is the fashion these days, and that no one understands them. Personally I think this is due to a lack of communication, or lack of attempts at communication. So much for being misunderstood.)

M:around you, or yourself?

K:hurm. myself. not the people around me because they kinda think it is quite cool

M:huh. alright. you would recommend this to anyone?

K:hurm. just about everyone. except people who really well like talking

M:i aplogise but I must refuse

K:hahaha. hurm. but it allows you to appreciate talking
but also gets you to like the silence (Interesting point here, about not talking allowing you to appreciate talking.)

M:ouch. thanks for the interview
anything else you like to say?

K:like there will be moments where i'll just not want to talk at all hurm. not much else?

M:alright. and by the way. everything you just said can and will be used against you
http://www.pressbackspace.blogspot.com/ (She still pleads not guilty.)

K:okay. see ya (in court)

M:thanks

And so there you have it. The complete interview with Kylie on her vow of silence for one day. There are some interesting topics up there that I would like to rant about.

For instance, how most people regard verbal silence as complete silence, Kylie's parents' reluctancy (and in fact, complete disapproval) towards her vow, and the appreciation of talking through silence.

This is all very interesting and I would like to discuss this with you, but I'm bored and needs me entertainment. Goodbye.

Fisherman's Fiend

I'll make it short and sweet. My bag got stolen today. Once again, I would like to thank Nintendo for making their consoles so resistable.

Ironically, it happened on a Sunday. But that's the part responsible for indigestion. Wait till I get to it.

Left bag at table. Went to buy food. Bag focuses chakra around body. And I was like "Whoa! You have learnt well!". That didn't last long though.

One family noticed me evading nitrogen, so they asked if I was looking for my bag.

Me: Yeah.
Man: She said one indian man came over and took it. (points to daughter)
Me: Whoa.

And we couldn't find him. However, there is an upside to all this. This guy won't get much out of the loot. There are several reasons for this.

Firstly, recent market analysis has shown that the value of erratic, half broken violet umbrellas has gone down. Therefore, a second hand, half broken violet umbrella (pant pant) will fetch negligible profit.

Secondly, recent religious devices, such as white-beige colored bibles, have included a search and destroy protocol that allows it to carry out the work of God. aka, totally anhiliation of the one who stole it.

Thirdly, recent studies have shown that not many citi/deni-zens of singapore are fans of Hitchiker's guide to the Galaxy.

Finally, market projections have shown that the value of half eaten Apple and Cinamon Fisherman's Friend lozenges have dwindled greatly. However, they do still serve the purpose of soothing the thief's throat.

"NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!"

Amen to that.

I will sur-wife!

The title is simply a tribute to all those who sacrificed themselves in run- battle. They will be remembered, and flowers shall cover their graves forever.

Plus, Gan is allergic.

Alright. I've been trying to get more sleep these days, instead of *cough* blogging about the damn problem. So I'm going to retire soon, and settle down in the countryside, then wake up tomorrow and study. Isn't life great?

The reason why my cracks lately haven't exactly been of World Trade Center standards is because of this. I'm going to have to be-itch about it sooner or later. Here it is:

I was attacked by Damien.

This is pretty old news. I'm also trying to keep it that way.

But I just find it kinda gay. Guess what else I found? Ah nevermind...

The thing is that, I've been giving puppies the gift of flight lately because of this matter. It's not so much what he did but rather why he did it. Damien's reasoning is that he's very stressed, so when I gave him the VR (we do this cool stuff in place of IR...... this window looks high enough) assignment for our group, he could only do one paragraph. alright. here it is... gave him one week. okay. he forgot... so er... gave him one night after I called him again.

Gave me on paragraph the next day. It was kind of a personal introduction more than it was a list of interview questions. After *cough* confronting him on this matter... er...

Did you know the throat is needed for breathing? It's true! Sigh....

Yeah. He kinda gave the jump on me. What also bothers me is that I was pwned in front of everyone in the concourse. Of course, the security guard has a gun, so I was saved. (*insert bullet deflection joke here*)

Now the disclaimer. I understand he is stressed. That's bad. What I don't understand is why I should get a piece of the pie. After this incident, we've grown so dist- er... I kinda think of him as the more stabbable sort, you see where I'm going with this?

Recently he attacked David because of an erased Pokemon savegame.

Damien, use Vice Grip!

Learn to relax buddy... I can't say it's not partially his parent's contributions that caused this though. They really have been crossing the line lately. He had a fever, then was just recovering, and still had a cough and BURNT HIMSELF in the shower, and his mom wouldn't take him to a doctor. No, a private doctor. Not that either.

There's one thing we can learn from this though.

"Sheesh."

Fic-ture Perfect



The days of the canon are over, and it is time to usher in the age of fanfiction. Or is it?



Let's face it. Fanfiction has been around for as long as any series ever existed. It started even with classics such as Alice in Wonderlan and Sherlock Holmes. And that it proceeded to infect just about every popular series ever published.



Internet, you didn't exactly make matters better.



And whilst it can be pretty much agreed that most fanfiction really sucks arse, there are several few that stand out among the crowd, sucking even more. This is especially true when it comes to anime and manga fics.



We at http://www.pressbackspace.blogspot.com/ have scoured the land for the most revolting, sh*ttiest and "rinsed and repeated more than Beryl could ever hope to do" ideas and fanfiction types across the internet (mainly just fanfiction.net). Behold, risk your eyes. Here they are:



1. High School fics- An insult to the holiest of holiest of anime and manga, behold, take the greatest cause of suicide in the world and plug in your favourite anime characters. Now watch as your favourite anime characters struggle to avoid drowning in a sea of homework, teenage romance, and high school fanfics.

The problem with High School fics is that, like many others, there are so damn many of them. Most of them usually include pairings, and the remainder ALWAYS includes pairings. And the problem is, that's just about it. Your sword wielding hero, or your orange jumped suited ninja living the life that you don't want to know more about, and just grabbing the ass of the nearest..... PERSON. (You know what I'm talking about, you bloody Yaoi fic writers)

2. Crossovers- Well, you've already bastardized one anime? Why not do two, or something of an entirely different genre? This one appears most often when the author doesn't know which one to mutilate first, so settles it via Democracy.

Viva la Revolution.

3. Script fics- Yes. Sometimes your favourite fan fiction authors out there are just too lazy to think of anything besides dialogue. So they settle it by doing this.

Samuel: They simply type the character's name at the front of every dialog, er... every sentence and proceed to type NOTHING but dialogue.

S: Sometimes, your authors are so lazy, they just type the name once and proceed to use a vague initial for the rest of the series or fic. This can lead to confusing situations sometimes.

*** naruto fan boys cover your eyes ***

N: You cannot change, Ramen. It is fate.

K: Asuma, don't go, I love you!

S: I love you, Naruto!

So there you have it. Three of the most overused ideas in the fan fiction universe. This has been Samuel persuading the prisoners, signing off.